my camel is dead

i used to enjoy my camel ride. up and down the hill. through the nasty forest and bushes. sand storms can be blurry but not my camel. but now my camel is dead. leaving me back. down on the ground. on my knees whining on its dead. he's dead not caused by lack of water but motivation to live..

its just a metaphor dude..

my camel ride is my life. the ride of my life. through ups and downs. my joy and sadness. my pain and gain. i used to enjoying those memories. life (the nasty forest) is like a movie, changing pictures from one scene to another. stored in a film of memoir, rest and remembered. blurry sand storms did leaves me in pain. clear tears did drops. i just couldn't help everyone. i just couldn't help myself. some pain did leaves me with scares. a permanent mark to be remembered till the D day.

i used to enjoy my ride. along with a company of love who always there. through the nastiest forest and bushes of life. who will wipe the clear water out of my face. who will bring me up when i'm losing my faith. who will trust and believe in me, maneuvering my camel of life. who help me to feed my camel. who cares for my camel. the camel i rode, together with the usual suspect. but now the same things happened. the usual suspect is gone. missing. leaving me missing.

now, no one to feed my camel. nobody to help my camel. i can't do this alone. i'm used to the old way. the way which i was together; feeding and pampering my ride. the week it goes, the weak my camel went. seems like the clear water out of eyes had dehydrate my ride. no one to wipe nor filled my ride anymore. as the time passes by, i just realized my camel is dead. caused of wet of waters. caused of lack of motivation. the motive to live..

i'm just gonna sit and whining for the moment. till i got the strength to get up which i donno when. just gonna follow the wind flows up to the north of down to the south.. damn it!!